What if - Jadon Lavik (FULL SONG & Lyrics)

Homecoming

We baked bread. and waited.

we took naps.... and waited.

                   We killed time.... and waited                                        

then we headed to the place...

where these guys stood and saluted them

and with anticipation

stood with our banners

in the rain.... waiting

patiently

or maybe a bit impatiently

and then they arrived

and we found

amidst the crowd

our Marine

renuited

with us again

so we packed him up....

and brought him home

 We love Him because He 1st loved us

1 John 4:19

 and I am so thankful to be loved today

because knowing that eases the missing the one we love.

Happy Valentine's Day

Celebrate with the one you love and Rejoice over the One that adores you



This morning...

I woke up and realized its Friday...

this week we have mopped floors a little bit extra,
     stopped at Seaworld...
            finished up weekly lessons....

and realized.

by this time next week
               we won't be doing it alone.

and while I still don't have *dates*

  and I most certainly don't ask for a flight plan

    it is soon.

     I think.

and once he is home.

      well

         the deployment will be over.

sweet sleepy boy

Calculated Risks

I am so SURE the move to the desert is the right thing to do....
then week after week
I attend NewSong Community Church
and I question it.
It's not a deep feeling of "this is where I belong"
but more of a "what if?"

Sometimes it feels like my life is a series of calculated risks....

mostly in relation to how hurt I will get when it is time to move again.

and what if we move in April and this *is* where we are supposed to be?

How will we know... for certain?

I suppose I am waiting on my husband's homecoming for final decisions.
but just this week the conversation went someting like this...

Kiah " I can't wait to move to the desert when daddy get's home"
me "um, Ki... you DO understand Daddy will not be moving to the desert with us for at least another year"
at this point Kiah is almost crying
me "he'll be home on the weekends though"
Kiah "maybe we shouldnt move, I dont want to be without daddy again"

for me it was heartbreaking.

I am trusting that The Lord will CLEARLY mark which path HE wants for us.

please keep us in prayer
especially as we sort through this muddle of emotions

because at the same time, my kids long to be back in the desert...
although I will miss life here in oceanside something fierce...
I cry every time I leave there...
for some reason my heart is tied to that place...

and yet...

I find myself ask "what if?"

I don't count the days

deployment.

I didn't try to count the days til he left.

I didn't count the days once he left.
well.
not all the time.

I mean 30 days after he was gone, at some point on that day I remember thinking to myself...
"we survived the first month"

I couldnt bring myself to try to even really determine a halfway mark...

so at Christmas when he said we have passed that....
it was a blessing.

and now...

it is almost the month he will come home.
almost 6 weeks earlier than originally planned.
and I am counting our blessings.

we are keeping busy
making paper chains
and banners to celebrate his homecoming...
which is soon...
but not too soon.

and I am really trying not to count.
because the days could change.
but it is a season of excitement
and preparing
for being together
again.

and the world will feel complete again.