Friday, June 29, 2012

My "It's NOT a 5 minute Friday " post

so it's Friday.... which means I whould be writing my "5 minute Friday post on ...Dance"

and I just don't want to.

lately I am facing a lot of that.

Things I *should* do that I just don't want to do.

and I am angry.

and scared.

The changes are coming.

And I do not like them.

I am angry that I did almost everything in my power to get the horses here and yet my 17 yr old no longer even seems to care. And all that time and energy and money into my paddock was supposed to be our trip to family camp at Forest Home.... and now we cannot go. And I am really trying not to be resentful about it. but I am having a difficult time.

I feel like all getting out of the USMC has done is prove how broken our family is.

And we aren't broken in BIG ways just a million little tiny ways.... or so it seems.
to me anyhow.
Not that you could ever see it.
Or even that we try to hide it.
Cuz we don't.
in fact we are accused of being WAY to real.

so one more dryer full of clothes and checking the oldest two kidlets bags who are off to church camp tomorrow. & I need to spend a few minutes... well maybe more than that in prayer that my heart wouldn't be resentful that they get to go ... even if it's not Forest Home.... and I do not. and really, it's not like family camp could have fixed those million broken shattered peices all in a week anyway...

1 comment:

Casey C. Springer said...

You are such a rebel ;)

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