Sunday, October 11, 2009

Back in the saddle again.... or not.


So this week has been a week of MAJOR changes...

mom n dad have moved in a little over a week ago

no baby has arrived...yet.

school lessons are running, although different than usual, in a new way we are adapting to...

getting my dad to dr appointments/ signed up for MediCal and other stuff, celebrating an 8 yr old and 3 yr old's birthdays.... life is NOT dull...

and saying that I have had very few moments to even sneak online and read blogs, much less write on mine. Which leads me to the conversation I had with my husband this afternoon... which went something like this...

" I think I am going to shut down my blog" to which he quickly replied " Why on earth would you do that?" " You have more stuff to share now than ever before, ways to show God's hand through a storm..why would you stop now....?"

the answer is I don't know.

I don't know any answers... I only know God is in control. I know the minutes of each of my days are quite busy now- and that will be even more true once this little baby of ours makes his grand appearance...

So.

I AM here. but not as often as I would like to be.... much like the hours I am at church. I feel distant and removed from so much right now... a season where my first ministry must be at home. It is a time of self sacrifice and loving in a way I would have never expected I would need to. It is a time of ministry to my parents... a ministry I barely even understand...

I feel so detached and alone some days, and in many ways I am. But Jesus is still walking beside me each and every step of the way...

as far as my blog, for now, I guess it stays

and the direction in which it is headed ... well I guess I will be in prayer about that for now...

2 comments:

Hols said...

I am in the midst of helping a friend through an extremely difficult time in her life and I feel as if I am not doing enough and all that I do do is a bunch of busy work, but you know, through it all the Lord is working through me in great ways. It is simply that I cannot see it, but I know it because my friend tells me so. I beleive the Lord is working mightly through you even though you cannot see it or do not feel it. I believe the fact that we cannot see it is a good thing for it keeps us humble and totally relying upon God for all that we do. So keep hanging onto Him and doing what you have to....He's working.

Post Tenebras Lux said...

You guys are in a hard, hard place. I'm sorry! I'm glad you are able to learn to lean harder on the Lord in it. Thank you for your prayers for us! I ask for strength and wisdom, and above all God's love for you.