Thursday, May 10, 2012

Silence... *take 2*

I honestly don't know what to blog about. This move has been a struggle for me.
 On many levels.
 but there is so much in the fine lines that I can't talk about.
 This transition into "civilian life" is hard. Being a "Marine wife" has, to a degree defined me for the last 18 years.
This move has been not as it seemed it would turn out. In that alone there have been challenges.
 The choices my husband has chosen for our family are not what I ever thought they would be when he retired from the USMC. But if I blog about those I need to prayerfully do it in a way where I talk about it openly without dishonoring my husbands choices.
 & then I consider blogging. and I think about my dear friends that are going through something .. and I feel like if I blog about the rough times on my blog.. well.. to be honest they aren't so rough at all.
 which kind of put things in perspective and I stay silent.

 I am trying to be content in what I have this season.
 it's not easy.
 and as this new season in our life launches.

 I am afraid.

 and I sit and re-read scripture that tells me not to be afraid. and I fell like I don't belong. anywhere. and I can't really blog about that ... can I?
 & we are rebuilding a micro ranch... I * could blog about that* but what is there to say.
 and having a new baby... yep.. topics without time.
 and I am finding , in this season, I am all of a sudden worried about saying the wrong thing and offending someone. &
 homeschooling... yep there is yet another topic that I honestly dont think anyone wants to hear from me about.
 so pray for me. that I cold find my writing mojo.
 I do miss it. But I just don't know what to say or how to say it. & what I am "struggling" with is nothing compared to others so I am having a hard time ... well blogging... about the change.


mom22evs said...

I am glad you feel you can share some of your feelings with us I know about being unsure of things and struggling against the fear, trying to rest in Him when you may feel so many things are unsettled. But I know you well enough to know that you will trust Him for all things even when it's hard. I will be praying for you. God be a comfort to my friend and sustain her through the difficulties that come with life changes, let her feel the love and support of friends and sisters in Christ. You are precious to Him and He careth for you. I pray that you are bolstered in this knowledge everyday, and that in him you feel secure.

Heather said...

Amen...what our sweet friend, Caren said (((HUGS)))-Heather

Unknown said...

I always love reading what you have to write. You so well express many things that are on my own heart.

I pray that you have Shalom that passes all understanding.

Kristi said...

Hugs to you Jennifer! I will be praying, rest assured, as all your friends will, new (like me) and old. Gordon and I are moving very soon and I have a thousand concerns..I rally do..Ive thought of starting a blog myself, but Im not the best writer and besides no one would want to read it, I tend to babble and maybe complain too much..ha! Hope to see you soon! Kristi Rice (Teresa P's friend from EVFree)